*mom mode*....

being a long distance mom, it never ceases to amaze me just how natural & quickly i'm able dust off and pick up right where i left off. when the boyz were out, we just seemed to fall into our usual routine and understanding of how things work between moms & sonz... it just seems so natural for me.

i love *mom mode*, i really do, but...

for the longest time, i felt that i should have never been a mom, that i wasn't meant to be a mom, and that i didn't really have what it took: lots & lots of unconditional love, a firm hand [so to speak], compassion, patience & tolerance, fairness & straight forwardness, and just *mom-like*...  after years of therapy, evaluating difficult decisions, and soul searching, i started seeing things a little different about myself.  but it's not always easy, especially since *mom mode* w. my boyz doesn't happen on a regular schedule. 

but it's weird... i find myself teetering ever so slightly on the *mom mode* thing again... i love having kids around, and feel so comfortable with the whole *family* thing... my biggest concern is to not *overdo* it... to not overstep my bounds and step over others' personal boundaries. so i sit back, do my thing [quietly], and let things just happen. 

all i can say is that i'm happier than i have been since..... well, happier than i can ever remember, and content, and feel safe & loved....  guess i have a certain Wollf to thank for that...